Here is a photo I shot last night for those of you who haven't given up all rights to their privacy by signing up for Facetube. (Yeah, you, Cali boy)
If you haven't noticed, I've been shooting a lot lately, whether it's cameraphone shots on Instagram or full shoots like I've been doing with Micah and more recently, the Ford GTX1 that was hanging out at Brothers over the weekend. I'm trying to figure out what the hell I'm waking up for everyday and trying to make it more satisfying. One of the big factors is my current job situation and trying to understand where I'd like to be tomorrow, next month, next year, or in 5 years from now. I'm finding out that it's pretty hard to figure out what you want to do, if you've never actually done it or made an attempt to do whatever it is. All I do know is that when I wake up on any given non-holiday weekday, I usually say to myself, "why am I still doing this". That's probably not a good thing to say to yourself before breakfast.
Thanks to a few friends who put it bluntly, "do you even want to be a photographer?", "is this even what you want to do", and "if you only work 40hrs a week, you have no excuse why you can't shoot new stuff every week". I've refocused (pun intended) and just started shooting, anything and everything. If I can get just one shot a week that's portfolio worthy, that's a 52 page portfolio at the end of the year that will be pretty kickass.
I've also made some big scary decisions this week that may help me get much closer to where I want to be in my work life. It's scary, I've been filled with anxiety the past two days wondering if I screwed up and opened my mouth to soon, but I've also received a lot of good advice and support. A month from now, I may be a dishwasher by night and photo assistant by day, or I may still be shooting boatcars by day and working my arse off at night. Either way I better have a new portfolio piece every week or you guys have failed me as a support system (just kidding, not really.)
You're all too talented and smart to not be living your dreams, whatever they are. Keep up the hard work and do whatever it takes to make yourself happy. No one likes a crab ass.